Your Salvation, They Are

Okay, I’m totally stealing that headline from my buddy Eric over at MouseGuest, but I just couldn’t resist. I’m sitting in the San Francisco Airport waiting for a delayed flight, and I get this email from him pointing me to an NPR story, “A Gospel According to Yoda.” Curse this airport WiFi, it’s strong enough to let me post this article but too flakey to let me listen to streaming NPR. . . but I do find a link from NPR to the UK Church of the Jedi, which seems to have grown considerably since I first heard of them some years back. From their home page:

The Uk Church Of The Jedi started in 2003 when Master Morda Hehol (Head of Church) and his apprentice Jo-Jak Hawil dedicated there life style to that of the Jedi way. After years of training Morda trained his brother JonBa Hehol up to be a jedi master and the two started a ministries in 2007. Using some teachings that are available from other UK jedi churches and writing there own the church grew and decided to make an online chapter Uk Church of The Jedi. Now the church organization controls most jedi churches in the UK, and gains members world wide.

Now, lest ye judge, let’s also remember that there’s an emerging academic course of study on “Disneyism” as a religion. So dude, before you pick up that rock, better make sure your walls aren’t made of glass.

Trip Report from Holy Land Experience, Circa 2002

News broke last week that the Trinity Broadcasting Network has stepped in to save the Holy Land Experience, a Jerusalem-themed attraction not far from Disney World.

Mr Broke Hoedown (aka Collateral Damage) has just published a trip report from his April 2002 visit to the Holy Land Experience. Here’s a snippet from his report:

After getting my ticket, I then passed through the Jerusalem Gate, sans Ass or Palms, and wandered straight into a recreation of a Jerusalem street market which might easily be confused with a souvenir shop. The tchotchkes offered here and at various carts around the park are all Old Testament: a variety of shofars, several types of menorahs and jet black yarmulkes (suffice to say this selection of keepsakes has done nothing to soothe Jewish feelings about the park). The day I was there there was only one depiction of Jesus to be seen: a standard-issue, saccharine painting of an Anglicized Him meeting the woman at the well. All other paintings feature either Moses or Abraham. Indeed this lack of Christian imagery is ubiquitous throughout the park and on its customers. I didn’t see a single cross on anyone inside of the park. The only cross I did see was a small and relatively discrete one in The Land’s logo: It takes the place of a star in the sky over a silhouette of the old Jerusalem skyline. Admittedly that logo is on everything from key chains to tote bags to t-shirts but compared to the trifurcated circles of Mickey Mouse which are incorporated into buildings, landscaping and food at Disney World, The Holy Land is a model of restraint. (Indeed after visiting The Land, I was keenly aware of what it meant to have Disney’s corporate logo offered to me in cookies, ice cream and cakes of butter. Body of Mickey, anyone?)

I suppose you won’t be surprised to know that Broke Hoedown Jr and I spent the day in Fantasyland instead.

Religious Skywriting over Walt Disney World

Every now and then someone will post to my favorite Disney message board, asking, “What’s up with the religious skywriting over Disney World?”

“Turn To Jesus – Home of Holy Smoke” explains it all for you.

God loves you so much that He is writing love letters to you in the sky. His love for you is so big that it could not be put on a piece of paper or on a TV screen. God doesn’t want you to miss his message, so He is writing it just for you on the sky that He created. His message is this: He Loves You! He wants to do great things for you, both in this life and in the next.

One page includes a piece of text I find particularly interesting: Click here to accept God’s Love. Such the interesting moment here in our digital age.

I’ll also mention, just for the benefit of those few unfortunate souls who read this blog regularly, that I’m heading out on vacation for about a week. See ya real soon!

Flash Mountain Harassment Suit Close to Settlement

From Boston.com (via The Disney Blog):

A settlement is underway in a federal lawsuit that states that Lawrence [Massachusetts] city officials failed to take proper action after learning that the city clerk allegedly sexually harassed an employee by using the woman’s office computer to view pornographic websites and making sexually explicit comments.

The Disney connection?

In 1998, Padellaro’s lawsuit alleges, McGravey began visiting pornographic websites, including one called “Flash Mountain,” which posts photographs of women exposing their breasts on a ride at Disney World. McGravey, in court filings, admits that in 1998 and 1999, he occasionally logged on to inappropriate websites from various locations at work, and that he and other city employees logged onto the “Flash Mountain” website.

The Daily Show: Disney vs. Anaheim Housing Dispute

Not recommended for Disney purists or the easily offended, it’ll just get yer hackles up. (Though I’m guessing none of those folks read this blog anyway, now do they?)

And hey, don’t watch this one with the kids either, unless you feel like explaining what fellatio is.